Shaded Heart

I am the shadow
cast on that thin silver thread,
if only briefly.

Across fields of golden grain I see her
walking, or marching, down this aisle of Fate.
Gracefully she moves as a timeless specter
or some ethereal beauty yet unseen.

Her scarlet dress dances under harvest moon
as I sing to her whispers of endless song;
Those amber strands anoint her supple face,
deservingly crowning her august head.

My arms yearn to touch her tender hands
and my legs itch to drag me to her feet.
My heart dreams to simply watch her smile
and to gaze endlessly in those cerise eyes.

Yet, I remain motionless and silent;
my limbs imprisoned by some insidious fate;
my voice stricken by some soulless warden.
The crows overhead mock my imposition.

Splintered thoughts cannot express
the violence that powers these wounded hands.
As each twisted line slips away,
I am one awkward step closer to my fate.

Inside the wisdom of a tainted grape
I find no delusions, no distractions
from my malevolent realities. Instead
the pain ferments inside: a bitter crop.

Rage soothes me but does not satisfy
the lurid desires of a shaded heart;
as each blackened grain of time falls
that radiant desolation spreads further inward.

Listless nights drown me with a vast silence
and faded splendor of worlds unobtainable.
Here I live beneath a placid surface;
a cold and wavy face adrift in time.

Take me by the hand again
You pull me deeper in
Inside the dream that I call “You”
You make me want to live again

Look me in the eyes and say
Speak to me from your heart
Tell me how it’s going to end
Make us different from the rest

Hold me close and never release
You take my breath away
Time stands still in endless wonder
At the moment of your touch

D ear so a precious love,
I nscripted with the edge of time
A re symbols of my joyous heart
M ade to last a lifetime
O ur souls now intertwine
N ot unlike a candle’s fire
D istinguishes from the darkest
S hadows of my love

In the quiet stillness of night
As the rain softly taps on my heart
A breeze gently rustles through my mind
Which carries the whisper of your name

Months of time pass in seconds
As I lust for the thought of you
I fear to be left alone with my thoughts
Alone without the sound of your name

Words spill onto paper like blood
And they flow through the veins of pages
That somehow these feeble words might suffice
And fill your heart with the love I breathe

When the days become long and hot
And the sun again shows no mercy
The thought is burned into my head
The memory of my summer past

The painful ones I’d rather forget
These better ones I hardly know
My broken thoughts have pulled together
Time has slowly found its way

Well I bet you never understood
I’m guessing you were that blind
The things you did to kill my heart
When I needed you the most

The times when I would fight at home
Those days I bet you never cared
Did you care enough to look inside?
Pain was swelling in my eyes

My self had become lost in me
My soul had become unclear
Did you see the loss in me?
You never tried to help me find

When I only needed someone to hold
You went and ripped yourself away
When I was weak you struck me down
Did you ever even understand?

Even when I was falling after you
Did you catch me before I hit?
The nights I cried over my loss
I bet you never knew about those

But when I hit I stood right up
Hand by hand climbed out of pain
Now you want what you always had
What you selfishly gave away

I won’t let you drag me down again
I’m bruised but I’m not beaten
And this isn’t a hate letter, oh no
This is merely an explanation

In a world of no forgiveness
In a realm of many tears
In this sphere of sorrows
And of relentless fears

In a place of no tomorrow
You can only find today
And you live in your past
Where your life seems astray

There’s a place of loving
A perfected conceal
Where everything is peaceful
And your dreams become real

If you’d only let me love you
I’d show you the way
To my small piece of heaven
Where forever you can stay

If you’d put your past behind you
And gave to me today
Tomorrow we’ll face together
If it could only be this way

You say that you know me
But you have yet to see
You think you’ve got me figured out
But I’m forced to disagree

Confide to me your darkness
And I will give you my light
Tell me your deep regressions
And I’ll still love you tonight

Can you grasp my love for you
You must know it is real
And when you keep things from me
Pain is all I can feel

There were times things seemed so clear
I put away those things that I fear
All I wanted was for you to be mine
You told me that you needed some time

Days passed as they turned into weeks
But I stayed with you, I’m not that weak
Then you told me that things were okay
The day I had you – this day I’m most afraid

We’re together but now I’m holding back
Constant struggle this inner attack
I want you so bad, what can I say?
I never want to see you walking away

Now that you have taken your time
Show me now that you want to be mine
I’ll hold you close in the faintest of light
If I could only steal your kiss tonight